Informal Theme 3.3

Where the HELL do I belong?

It was pitch dark, all I can see are smokes belching from places I don't even know, seldom fireflies flapping their wings to it's full extent and a light from a far-off building, which I guess is not within our school grounds. Oh mi gosh, Where am I? I have been walking for quite a while when I realized that I'm not in a place where I'm supposed to be, not at this moment, not at this time. I'm at Cavite National Science High School, alone in the dark with no light and money to guide me home but just myself, and I think my guts to help me survive at least the very moment.

I walked down an isle, one that I haven't passed on before. I was trying to get rid of the place because it was creepy and dark and I feel totally lost. As much as I go through, the walls narrowed so was the wooden floor, which was dirt like three seconds ago. I closed my eyes, try to just walk randomly so that maybe I'll be out of this labyrinth as soon as possible but as I open it, I'm standing in front of the very gate of CNSHS along with Kuya Eddie and the sinners of the First Sin: Tardiness. Students here are punished by having them write a 10-page-long narratives in 5 font size. I swiftly tried to drift away because I can see some of my friends there but I can't touch them, it's like being helpless to something you could be of help.

Things were dragged again and then I was in our II-Nitrogen room where the students who commit the Second Sin: Laziness are punished by Ma'am Jenette by making them clean the room and the room was like producing its own tons of trash and dirt. I cannot take it anymore then everything was dragged again. I fainted.

When I woke up, I was at the clinic and it was written there Third Sin: Lying then students were punished for their fake diseases they made up when they want to sneak classes and go to the clinic and it lasts for 5 days.

I ran and ran. Panting, I tried to get my breathing back but it became worse than what it's supposed to feel then it felt like everything was dragged the gate, students, buildings and furnaces until I was in a room, I was in the Biology Lab With Ma'am Elaine punishing the students that committed the Fourth Sin: Forging. Students here are punished by having them hypnotized into making them feel the pain of having their nails pulled off, without having their nails really pulled off. It was awful that I cried.

I walked this time, maybe I took the path to the gate but then I realized I was heading for the principal's office. 'Fifth Sin: Cheating' was written at the door of it and when I sneaked a peak, I saw students punished by Ma'am de Vera, Ma'am Pareja and Ma'am Lenny and the punishment was indescribable. I can't take it anymore and I tried to relax and all thinking all these things are impossible then I prayed and swear to God that I won't do any of these ever. I woke up, alive, breathtaking and everything was fine and I felt a great relief.

Today I choose life. Every morning when I wake up I can choose joy, happiness, negativity, pain... To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue to make mistakes and choices - today I choose to feel life, not to deny my humanity but embrace it. -- Kevyn Aucoin